Of tired rambles

I'm tired. Completely beat.

For the first time as far back as I can remember, my "five more minutes" this morning turned into an hour. It would've been more if my mother hadn't come in and warned me. I love you momma. Thank you for dishing out the cab fare so I didn't miss class. Thank you for never denying me coffee and clothes and books and other material bliss, and thank you for all the other non material goodness, like sharing your blankie and filtering out papa's snores while watching the cricket world cup at midnight.


School bores me, incredibly much. I have a somewhat interesting assignment for once, but I wonder if I'll really do it justice. I have a history of letting myself down when it comes to desire.


I hate children. I can't believe I ever seriously considered having a huge family. Shopping during the school holidays makes my head hurt. I'm glad Vivo City isn't as popular as it should be. I'm also glad for surprise sales, and being able to give presents. I hope you really liked the stuff doof, and aren't just saying so. Happy Birthday again.


I don't understand people who give gifts without thought. My ex-boyfriend once mentioned how that was one of the things he loved about me. I always thought that a bit odd. But then again that whole relationship was odd. He's seen me cry countless times, and with most other people it's a miracle if they've seen me cry even once. I don't cry. I get pissed off and storm away, not bawl. Never saw the point. Only time I cry is when I'm strained to brimming point with that whole "being strong" business. It's tiring. You have no idea.


Tonight, for the second time, the stray cat at Siglap Linear Park tried to follow me home. I wanted to sit down on the road and just cuddle it for a while. Wet fur from the rain, and pitiful meows. At least it was fat. Being fed is always a good thing.


I want a camera. And a working printer. And sleep.

And understanding. I'm more or less resigned to the fact that I'm going to stay confused, but somedays I'd rather hate than settle for limbo.


Bedtime. And tomorrow, cricket reruns, coffee, MizzBananaBliss, and a movie. Hurrah for days off.